Clinton is a 'Monster.' This Isn’t Fun Anymore

By Connect Mason Convergence Director and Columnist Lars Garvey Laing-Peterson

We entered into this contest riding high on a Wave of Change. Whatever the outcome, it was going to be something other than Bush. Shining white teeth opened to wildly spew promises out of these hopeful nominees’ mouths, out of our television sets, and we relished it being covered in their guarantees and saliva. We damn well deserved to feel good about politics again.

It’s been a long eight years for those of us who didn’t vote for W. It’s been a long eight years for those who did. This is more than evident in the fact it is John McCain that is the Republican nominee – not Huckabee, not Romney, not Giuliani. The Maverick won, not the Minister, the Mormon, or the 9/11 Candidate. Even Republicans were done with Bush and Cheney. We were to be saved, taken to the Promised Land on the shoulders of valiant men and women; this was the End of the Line, the true Mission Accomplished.

Where did it all become such a horrid, disgusting mess?

My opinion: when Hillary Clinton found herself with her back to the wall and, like some feral animal, her savage instincts kicked in. Her mauling of Obama has not only damaged her opponent, and arguably herself, but the entire Democratic Party. What was once meant to be a Sure Democratic Victory may well become a sad episode that Democrats will be long to recover from.

I’m a damned proud lefty. If I had it my way, we’d be paying 40% tax, riding buses to schools we don’t have to pay for, going to hospitals and doctors which would not send us bills – we’d be living the Socialist Dream. But I won’t have it my way, and part of me knows this is for the best with respects to the United States. This structure works in Sweden, where I spent some of the best years of my life, but that beautiful country only has to answer to 9 million people. This design would never work in America. I understand that, I even respect America’s system on numerous levels, but these Socialist dreams are the ones I wake up from when my alarm clock blares in the morning. They are only idealized more when I walk by the homeless in DC, when I watch another For Sale sign pop up in the neighborhoods around where I live, when I watch young Americans pass up university because they can’t afford it...

Don’t be too concerned, and, if you truly are, please schedule an appointment with me. I love to have political arguments. I enjoy watching my ideas challenged. My uncle Bruce – a gun-owning, hard-working, values-concerned Conservative in all that definition’s glory – and I like to frighten the rest of the Laing family with our raised voices, hectic and awkward arguments, and eventual spiral into abysmal darkness. But we walk out as Americans. We understand that the values, ideals, and systems of this country need to be questioned. Also, through our disagreements, we find much common ground. We are both, in our own ways, patriots. This term does not limit itself to any region of the political spectrum. Our disappointments with the United States stem from the vast potential we see within this country and its citizens. If I didn’t care about America, I wouldn’t bother to write about her. My uncle’s and my differing patriotism stems from the fact that the American Dream does not have one translation.

That said, if Hillary Clinton finds herself as the Democratic Party’s choice for 2008, I may have a few months of long, hard deliberation during which I shall decide whether I will vote Republican for the first time in my life. I know that my American Dream is not at the heart of Hillary Clinton’s personality. Her ideals may lie closer to my own political concerns, but her methods are comparable to that of Richard M. Nixon – one of the most despicable caricatures of hubris and arrogance to ever dance on the stage of American Politics. Clinton’s claims that she was under sniper fire ranks up there with Nixon’s proclamation that he was not a crook... and they don’t make them as crooked as Nixon anymore.

Give me the War Hero over the Liar. While McCain’s 100-year war quote, taken horribly out of context by numerous media sources (see: Liberal Media Establishment), is worrisome in some ways, I see a desire to better this country in McCain. If I ever make it to his age and can still walk around – both highly unlikely circumstances – I’ll be doing my walking on a beach, happily retired. He’s done more in his lifetime than I can hope and entire legion of my offspring could achieve in multiple generations. The man won’t quit.

Am I worried that McCain’s presidency will not address and resolve all the concerns I’ve had with W? Yes. But I’m equally worried that Clinton’s overwhelming desire to Win At All Costs will cloud her judgment. Hillary Clinton is a political monster – not in the way that I would call LaDainian Tomlinson a monster running back, but in the way I’d scream “Monster!” when stranded on the banks of the Black Lagoon – and her sickening personality inspires me with the same terror that I feel thinking that of the damage W has done to the American image during such a brief time.

Obama may have some issues, but I feel strongly that his fingerprints will not be found on the weapon that kills the Democrats. If I was Bill, I’d be filing for separation. Hillary is doing everything she can to destroy her husband’s legacy, ironically the very entity she hoped would sweep her effortlessly into Oval Office. I would like nothing more than for a woman to become President of the United States, I just don’t think Hillary Clinton is the right person, regardless of sex.

If this strange contest ends with Clinton as the nominee... I may have to ‘betray’ my party. Republicans like my uncle Bruce (along with numerous other members of the Laing family) and Mason’s own Joshua St. Louis have shown me that the Grand Old Party is not just made up of God-crazed, oil-drenched, money-worshipping, Earth-killing, war-mongering, immigrant-hating maniacs. McCain is pretty middle-of-the-road for a Republican. I’m not voting for the Fear Candidate (Giuliani) or God’s Candidate (Huckabee), but for an American Hero who has taken a number of snipes at his own party. I don’t feel like Judas or Brutus or any other epically disloyal figure. Clinton’s left me with little option but to question whether I can stomach voting for a fiend who bears my party’s colors.

Clinton has destroyed what might have been one of the pivotal elections of our time. Political memories are shorter than a goldfish’s – look how easily Nixon weaseled his way back into the spotlight – and so this blood may all wash off after the summer and many tunes, including my own, may change. But speaking of Change, this election is no longer about a shift away from the Bush Years, but a crossing of fingers that the Democrats will survive the summer, that voters will survive Clinton’s Fear Mongering (see: 3 a.m. ad), Lies (see: sniper fire), and rambling, incoherent speech (see: every debate).

A wise man once said that when it stops being fun, you should get out. These are words to live by.